“Endgame”???? THAT was the big secret? Laaaaaame.

Alternate titles are:

Avengers: Nebula (You all know she deserves to kill him)

Avengers: Crying and depressed superheros

Avengers: Thank god for Scott Lang

Avengers: Hawkeye spotted

Avengers: for real, fuck Grimace

Avengers: Contracts’ end

Avengers: help us, Carol Danvers and 90s technology, you’re our only hope

Avengers: Clint goes goth

Avengers: Hot Tub Time Machine

Avengers: just at the moment I think I’ve successfully emotionally detached from this hell they give me Tony, hopeless and dying in his sexy tanktop with the battered remains of his helmet sitting there as a metaphor for EVERYTHING, and I’m an emotional mess again

Avengers: Emotional Blackmail

Avengers: Where the fuck is Loki?

Avengers: Who the fuck is Loki?

Avengers: Why the fuck is Loki?

Avengers: Why do you stupid fangirls still care about that pretentious ponce when we are giving you all these patriarchy-approved Macho Macho Men to swoon over? Look, they’re even shedding manly tears of sensitivity, just for you

@philosopherking1887 I almost blocked you with a kneejerk click before I even read your post in full. Damn your manly tears. I used to like Tony, you know? A couple of years ago I’d had lapped this trailer up. Now I honestly don’t give a fuck.

C’mon, you know me better than that. I (used to) love Tony, too, but he’s gotten sucked into the vortex of self-important mediocrity that is the Markus & McFeely/Russo Brothers collaborations.









This is actually Tumblr’s Interregnum period. Our merrymaking has been temporarily banned by our puritanical overlords. 

THIS is the metaphor I’m gonna run with. This all eventually runs its course and then one of these days we’re all gonna party like it’s 1660.

Or, you know, the whole bloody place burns down in 1666.
Which stopped the plague, BTW.

Maybe tumblr has always been seventeenth century London all along. Maybe we’re all part of Pepys’s diary.

I mean, Pepys had a urine and spit kink so like. Yeah. Accurate.

oh my god


1, 4, 7, 12, 24 for Harry Potter themed asks. Thank you.

Oh wow, that’s a lot. Thanks for caring! 😉

1. Which Hogwarts house are you?
Ravenclaw or Slytherin. Slytherclaw?

4. Favourite character and why?
I think Hermione used to be my favorite character because she was me, and now McGonagall is my favorite character because she is me. Plus

ça change…

7. Favourite book and why?
Prisoner of Azkaban, for a variety of reasons. It’s a good length; it provides a genuine connection with an older generation and starts showing adults who are neither evil nor saintly, but flawed and human; it involves a time travel story that doesn’t make any of the more obvious mistakes (though don’t think about it *too* hard); its ending involves a partial, inconclusive victory over a messier assortment of villains. My next favorite is Half-Blood Prince, for similar reasons.

12. Thoughts on Severus Snape?
He’s complicated and I feel bad for him. I don’t like the way that “friendzone” discourse has made the ranks of The Woke reluctant to sympathize with characters who have a bad case of unrequited love and don’t handle it very well.

24. How do you feel about Cursed Child?
Uh… I read it once and I don’t remember much about it. I think it was kind of interesting but also kind of far-fetched?