technically if steve slaps it then never lifts his hand off it’s just one long slap
Tag: stevetony headcanons
steve, deliberately trying to annoy tony: good golly mr science man how do all these newfangled contraptions work? — tony, not buying any of steves bullshit: you taught yourself how to invest in bitcoin over the span of a week even when i told you that it was dangerous and unstable
sehuigrhuidr oh my GOD
tony, hissing protectively over the pot of coffee steve was trying to bait him with: stop trying to troll me, don’t you remember i can buy your entire life
steve, blowing off invisible dust from his fingers before putting them to the keyboard: i now have enough in bitcoin to rival your fortune, tony
IM CRYING OKAY JUST IMAGINE tony trying to explain the basics of roleplaying in bed to steve.
“so it’s us playing out scenes that might not normally happen?” steve asks.
tony nods, happy that steve is getting it. “exactly.”
after a brief silence, steve nods too. “okay. i think i have an idea,” he says.
“ooooh,” tony says, audibly excited, “you wanna surprise me with it tonight?”
so tony also talks him through how they can call it off if either of them want to stop at any time, and they set up to do it that night.
tony’s in the lab when jarvis alerts him that steve is coming. tony grins to himself, excited, but manages to keep working until he hears the door open and steve’s quiet footsteps. then out of nowhere he’s hoisted into a pair of strong arms.
“oh, my,” tony says, feigning demureness. “how forward of you, cap.”
but steve doesn’t talk all the way back up to tony’s bedroom.
“so, what’s going on, hm?” tony purrs when steve finally drapes him on the bed.
steve peels back the covers. joins him. and…pulls the covers back over them. and steve draws him close and pats his waist and says, “night, tony.”
“wait what,” tony says, smushed against steve’s chest, because neither of them are even naked.
“we’re roleplaying going to sleep on time,” steve says. “night, tony.”
tony’s too awed by his boyfriend’s tactics to kick him out of bed.
Steve’s Greatest Hits Of Roleplaying also include::
—Look at Us Eating Healthy Meals at Reasonable Times.
—What If We Get Kinky and Switch Coffee to Decaf
—Handcuffing Tony to the Bed Because He Was Too Reckless Yesterday and Needs to Sit This One Out
—Playing Doctor but Actually Taking You To the Doctor Because Tony You’ve Been Sick for a Week and I’m Not Accepting More Snotty Kisses and Wheezing Sex Noises
steve pouring decaf: isn’t this kinky, tony?
tony: i’m safewording