infinity war seems a lot more unnecessary when you remember that the mcu canonically has two (2) elders of the universe who could literally wipe the floor with thanos. like huge battle, Everything is bad, suddenly the grandmaster and the collector roll up in their party bus techno music blaring and thanos is melted into a puddle instantly
“Fuckin sweet” the collector says as he picks up the infinity gauntlet with his bare fucking hands “this is gonna look great above my big screen tv”
“who gives, uh, a shit about some shiny rocks? my trophy twink is here” calls out the grandmaster. he whisks loki away and they disappear in a puff of golden glitter to go play games across the stars
Taika Waititi: Tom, can I talk to you for a second?
Tom Hiddleston: Of course, go for it.
Taika: Alright so I love the whole Shakespeare villain thing you’ve been doing for Loki, but I have an idea.
Tom: Right?
Taika: Hear me out, alright? Get this. So, we do the whole narcissist thing again, but this time he’s Jeff Goldblum’s bitch.
Tom: I’m listening.
Thanos: abuses and tortures Loki
Loki: you just wait till my Daddy learns of this!
Grandmaster: ^Steps through the portal
Grandmaster: Is this man bullying you sweety?
Loki: yes, Daddy!
Grandmaster: melts Thanos’ ass with the metlstick
end credits roll with some shitty techno music
Honestly, though, the Age Difference in frostmaster is the most entertaining thing I’ve come across in fanfiction for a while. It’s sexy and funny, yet surprisingly meaningful, especially when it comes to Loki’s psychology as a character. I mean, come on, the God of Daddy Issues falling for an older guy cannot be treated as a coincidence, period. Putting aside the possibilities of banter, snark and sexy gay times, Loki’s need of attention and approval is the main reason why I ship these two dorks. Not to mention the intense Sugar Daddy/Sugar Baby subtext. Let’s speak straight, having an all-powerful creature with a thing for blue eyeliner getting him presents, calling him beautiful and celebrating/encouraging his mischief is probably the healthiest (and sexiest) coping mechanism Loki has ever come up with.
Loki is the Philosopher King 