You know what I want more of? Variety in aliens. No, I don’t mean more designs for alien species. I mean variety within a species. They always seem to have the same government, the same culture, the same religion, the same language. Come on, humans don’t work that way!
“Say, there’s a Qualar over there. What are they saying?”
“No idea.”
“What?”
“That’s a Kinzian Qualar. I’m a Surolian Qualar. You’d have just as much luck understanding them as I would. You’re lucky I even speak Human.”
“Human isn’t a language.”
“What?”
“Carl, we’ve been speaking Russian. There’s also Arabic, French, English–about a thousand others–”
“HOW DO YOU HAVE SO MANY LANGUAGES YOUR PLANET IS TINY.”
My favorite part about this is that the alien is named “Carl.”
I’m always annoyed at vampire stories where the vampire angsts about “oh, no, i’m a monster.” I mean, yeah, technically you’re a monster, but more importantly you have superpowers. You’ve got, depending on the canon, super-strength, varying degrees of invulnerability, the ability to turn into and/or command certain animals, some mind control. You can be a superhero, easy. Get over yourself, make a costume, and start fighting crime, you whiny Dracula.
This is basically the premise of “Angel.” With some continued angsting.
Okay, but this is an excellent method to use when anyone is being inappropriate. Pretend that you don’t get it. Whether the comment is sexist, racist, sexual, misogynistic, inappropriate, off-color… watching them squirm as they try to explain and realize just how awful their comment was it is better than being angry about it.
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My favorite is when they offer no arguments for what they believe, just respond to yours with, “If you believe that, you’re wrong.” I’ve seen this a lot when I call the obedience disk a torture device. I say it’s used on slaves. I say that it’s clearly shown to be painful for Thor and Loki. I say it makes it impossible for Loki to move (and even if he wasn’t in pain, your muscles spasming for an indeterminate amount of time would be fucking horrible).
I point to the intention in the script in extreme cases. Yet still I am wrong. I am delusional. And I’m one of those people who don’t care if people want to think of it as not that bad, because I get the appeal of faith, but I get very irritated when my reasoning is dismissed outright.
Flat, un-argued-for denial – effectively, the playground whine of “nuh-uh” – is always fun, but even better is when they blow past both counterargument and contradiction and go straight for accusations and insults. These tend to come in two flavors:
1. “You’re just a stupid straight girl who’s wet for Whedon’s psychopathic bad boy Tom Hiddleston in leather and wants him to dominate you like 50 Shades of Grey.” Often comes with a side of “You’re too homophobic for a queer character you can’t fetishize through slash,” ignoring the facts that a) Ragnarok never explicitly confirms that Loki is queer; b) the gay relationship that it strongly implies is a fucked-up exploitative sugar daddy arrangement with a sadistic, casually murderous slavemaster; and c) at the same time that it plays up Loki’s gay coding, it also presents him as shallow, narcissistic, stupid, and ineffectual. Real great queer representation, that. Not to mention that the “fetishizing through slash” has, if anything, ramped up post-Ragnarok (both Thorki and Frostmaster).
2. “You must just be a racist who hates that people of color are succeeding if you don’t worship Taika Waititi and everything he says, does, and makes.” There’s really no good way to rebut this one, because once you’ve been accused of racism on Tumblr there’s always a presumption of guilt. You say you loved Black Panther? Well, you must be racist against Maori/Polynesian/indigenous people. You really liked Moana? That’s like saying “Some of my best friends are [fill in the racial group].” You liked What We Do in the Shadows but thought that irreverent tone and the disrespect for the main characters was inappropriate for a Thor movie? You’re just mad because a POC wasn’t showing proper respect for white male characters and you can’t stand that characters of color (Valkyrie and Heimdall) were more awesome than the white characters. You liked Valkyrie and Heimdall in Ragnarok but that’s not enough to outweigh the outrageous retcon of Thor and Loki, the main characters you’ve been invested in for 3-4 movies? Why do you think white characters are so much more important than characters of color?
The notes on this post are showing 3 reblogs that I can’t look at when I click; it doesn’t even show the URLs that reblogged (if they exist). Is this just a weird Tumblr malfunction, or are people who have blocked me reblogging my shit again? If the latter, could some kind soul tell me who they are so that I can block them back? (Which is hard when you can’t search for someone’s URL… oh, the joys of being outspoken with unpopular opinions.)
Loki is the Philosopher King 