Ive followed you for a while and a lot of your posts that caused a bit of discourse were criticized for sounding pretentious People who don’t really know you and are just passing through because of the discourse would assume you’re cold and overly analytical while people who followed you for a while can see that you’re just trying to explain your thoughts in a way that clearly conveys what you mean

glumshoe:

Yeah, that’s something I’ve noticed, too. There’s no good response to that and there’s no way to prevent it. I’ve been hesitant to even bring this topic up at all because I know people will immediately respond with snarky “Oh, look, now they’re crying ‘ableism’! They‘ll find any excuse to play the victim!” which is… far from the truth, but not something you can argue against. My posts are often long-winded and overly-detailed. That pisses some people off, but it’s a “damned if you do, damned if you don’t” situation; say too little and words will be put in your mouth, say too much and you allow for cherrypicking and decontextualization. One of the biggest frustrations I have is people assuming that everything I say is meant to apply universally… if I were to say I prefer growing sunflowers over roses because they don’t have thorns, some people take that to mean I hate roses, or that thornless roses don’t exist, or that sunflowers can’t be prickly and unpleasant to the touch, or that no one should ever grow roses.

I’m wordy because I try to close off any avenues for misinterpretation or misunderstanding. It, uh, doesn’t seem to be very successful. Maybe I’m just not very good at displaying emotion through writing – just because I seem calm and collected (or cold and distant, depending on your perspective) doesn’t mean I am unaffected or insincere. Several years ago I had an altercation with a friend who assumed from my
manner that I was being nonchalant and clinical about a topic that was important to them, when in reality I was sobbing silently in the middle of a movie theatre for two hours with a racing heart and trembling body. They accused me of “trying to placate them with pretty words”, when all I was trying to do was climb the steep hill of interpersonal communication without centering the topic on my emotions. The more upset I am, the more I rely on formalized language and reasoning to navigate what my heart cannot be trusted to express.

[glances at wall of text] anyway yeah that’s just how me be I guess